SANTA LIKES THE MUSTANGS, TOO
A good crowd of West Orange-Stark fans were anxiously waiting for the kickoff between the Mustangs and Wimberley for the right to reach the state championship game this weekend at AT&T Stadium in Arlington. If there’s anything more annoying than the person in front of you jumping up and down like a Jack-in-the-Box at a football game, I just don’t know what it could be. But this senior citizen with a full beard dressed in stylish blue jeans and a Lumberjack shirt was the culprit that was really annoying me. I explained to him that our seats were really good and we could see everything that was happening on the field WITHOUT jumping up on every play. “I’ve heard so much about this team that hasn’t been defeated in three years and had to come see them for myself,” the man chuckled. As the game wore on, the man became more talkative. He admitted that he was at the game incognito and asked me if I would take a letter back to Orange with me and give it to Larry David. “I understand he has been representing me for a long time in your area,” he said very seriously. As we were walking out among the jubilant fans after our Mustangs beat Wimberley 30-21 the man leaned back toward me and said, “I can see why this team has won so many games. They do almost everything very well.” He disappeared in a flash and never told me not to peek at the letter I was supposed to deliver. This is what I sneaked a peek at:
WEST ORANGE-STARK HEAD FOOTBALL COACH CORNEL THOMPSON—His breakfast menu at the Waffle House on game day. It has worked at least 40 straight times.
HOUSTON ASTROS’ GENERAL MANAGER JEFF LUHNOW—A Special World Series Championship Ring to commemorate the crafty trades he made at this time last year. Without them there would be no rings for anyone.
NFL RULES COMMITTEE—A Diaper to remind them of some stupid rules that desperately need to be changed.
DALLAS COWBOYS—A Candle to represent the flicker of hope the Pokes have to make the playoffs as the final wild card.
ORANGE BRIDGE CLUB DIRECTOR ED RASMUSSEN—A Paul Revere Hat to wear every time he talks about his home state of Massachusetts. He’ll wear out that chapeau in no time flat.
TEXAS A&M NEW HEAD COACH JIMBO FISHER—A Trash Can he can use to throw out his prospector’s pick axe. He’s already found a gold mine at College Station.
SUNSET GROVE GOLFER CRAIG COUVILLION—A Taxi Sign to put on his golf cart and pick up his favorite passenger.
CLEVELAND BROWNS LOYAL FANS—Knowledge that they are supporting the first team in history to start consecutive seasons at 0-13.
NFL COMMISSIONER ROGER GOODELL—An Oversized Feedbag so he can continue to have the 32 owners seating out of his hand.
FORMER BAYLOR HEAD COACH ART BRILES—Lobbyists to convince the Incarnate Word Board of Directors to hire him as the school’s next football coach.
HOUSTON TEXANS STAR DEFENSIVE PLAYER J.J. WATT—A Halo to out around his head for the yeoman’s job he did raising $37 million for Houston Hurricane Harvey victims.
DEPARTED ORANGE RESIDENT JIM RODDA—A Golfing Partner willing to play 18 holes at the Sun City retirement community in Georgetown which has three difficult golf courses. It seems all of the “regulars” that play stop after nine holes probably because it takes almost three hours.
WEST ORANGE-STARK QUARTERBACK CHAKA WATSON—A New Record he would have set in the NFL with his 99-plus yard touchdown run he made against Wimberley Friday night in the state semifinal 30-21 victory. His run was a bit farther the record-setting jaunt by Dallas’ Tony Dorsett.
SUNSET GROVES’ KERRY LAMB—A Huge Hat Rack to hold the many hats he wears as Clubhouse Manager, Teaching Pro, Pro Shop Overseer and sometimes bartender and waiter.
NEW ENGLAND PATRIOTS AND DALLAS COWBOYS—The Bizarro Award for the manner in which they won their respective games Sunday. After scoring an apparent touchdown in the final two minutes, the Pittsburgh touchdown was ruled an incomplete pass because of that stupid rule about the ball moving after he slams into the ground. Then instead of kicking a field goal that would have tied the game, the Steelers tried to score from five yards out and eight seconds left which was intercepted giving the Patriots an easy win. The Cowboys won when Oakland quarterback Derek Carr reached out for the pylon and fumbled into the end zone for a touchback giving the Cowboys the football and the win.
SUNSET GROVE MEMBER BOB HOOD—A Computer Program to help him find a bridge partner in San Antonio as good as the one he’s leaving next month. His partner must do that too.
ARIZONA CAESINALS RUNNING BACK ADRIAN PETERSON—A 2014 Calendar so he can turn back time and retire from the NFL when he would have and be a shoo-in for the Hall of Fame on the first ballot. He’ll have a harder time after these last three unproductive seasons.
ALL NEWLY-CONTRACTED COLLEGE FOOTBALL COACHES—A High Wire to signify the fact they barely slipped under the wire before the new 20 per cent excise tax on annual salaries over $1 million goes into effect.
NEW YORK YANKEES—A Non-Electrical Powerhouse in the form of newly-acquired slugger Giancarlo Stanton and youthful Aaron Judge will provide opposing pitchers the fear of throwing gopher balls, but should boost their strikeout totals.
SUNSET GROVE GOLFER BOB HOEPNER—The Early Christmas Shopping Award that begins Jan. 1 when he starts looking for lost golf balls to present to his pals next Christmas.
KROGER PHARMACY MANAGER KYLEE RICHARD—The Bambino Award she will receive when her new bundle-of-joy daughter is born next summer.
SEATTLE SEAHAWKS PETE CARROLL AND HOUSTON’S BILL O’BRIEN—The Football Reality Award for realizing that massive injuries usually result in lop-sided losses, which both of them had to endure Sunday.
SUNSET GROVE GOLFER KEN RUANE—The Alternate Route Award after all the golf carts were ruined at the country club during the recent flood, Ken merely got his pull-cart from storage and now walks while playing the course.
AND A VERY MERRY CHRISTMAS TO Mike Lemons, Archie McClelland, Mark Dunn, Jeff Thomas, Johnny Montagne, Jerry Triggs, Ronnie Hutchison, Julie Mouton, Pierre De la Fosse, Chris Trout, Gwen Whitehead, Troy Manuel, Missy Pillsbury, John Prather, Brad Prejean, John Morris, Larry Moerbe, Judy Arnaud, Andy Conner, Tom Toal, Julie Mouton, Steve Betz, Jerry Windham, Bill Van, Rodney Barrett, Gail Beckett, Larry Ancelot, Bobby Nelson, Carl Sanders, Matt Purgahn, David Thompson, James Denmon, Mike King, Durwood Bennett, Bob Cockerill, Chris Allen, Matt Morgan, Sid Caillavet, Doug Patterson, Mike Shuff, Jim King, Tiki Russell, Alex Morrow, John Cochran, David Benoit, Bart Corder, Roy Peterson, Jimmy Sichko, Ken Ruane, Ron Hopperton, Joe Murphy, Walter Cox, David Ess, John Dubose, Lacy Hale, Mark Williams, Gary Cook, Bobby Eddings, Tommy Gunn, Mac Guillory, Buddy Hahn, Glynn Aldredge, Jim Rodda, Kerry Lamb, Brian Hudson, Stephen Patterson, Mike Poutra.
Joe Ely, Trez Sichko, Ella Mulhollan, Allen Beauchamp, John Patterson, Wanda Peveto, Larry Duhon, David Sand, Milton Newton, Mike Parish, Robert Baca, Jim Brown, Ruth Hancock, Mark Hebert, John Toomey, Beth Baas, Stacy Hoffpauir, Tina Lawrence, Richard Duffee, Tammy Torrez, Derry Dunn, Mike Shahan, Wes Duvall, James Welch, James Vidrine, Bob Hollier, Ken St. John, David Bridges, Jim Matthews, Tommy Reed, Alan McDade, Sandra Hall, Wayne Brint, Raquel Goodboddie, Jajemi Plut, V.L. Grimes, David Loden, Brian Waguespack, Manuel Godina, Joseph Droddy, Wayne Baker, James Thurman, Mac Patterson, Bill Belcher, Shanna McCallon, Don Olivier, Jerry Ling, Brenda Buxton, Regina Edwards, Frank Hatton, Willow Simpson, Kathy Gunn, J. D. Quarles, Wade Gillet, Jerry McDonald, Jerry Pennington, Chrisleigh Dal Sasso, Cathy Day.
Lindsey Nelson, Jim Sharon Bearden, Dan Perrine, Billy Burrow, Dan Cochran, Ken Bridgers, George Crawford, Michelle Broussard, Jim Simon, Jack McClelland, Scottie Wilson, Willie Bednar, James Lopez, Dennis Powell, Bobby Duhon, Carlos Vacek, Roy Locks, George Toal, Mike Lucia, Jim Dunaway, Jack Tindel, Ray Pousson, Jim Ehlert, Bryce Conner, Mike Mazzola, Faye Parish, Gilbert Myers, Kathy Polansky, Sweet Helen Edwards, Pat Murphy, Leo Simpson, Mike McKown, Clint Hathaway, Jerry Decker, Mike Holbrook, Lee Roy Boehme, Jr., Jerry Ann Trouard, Jimmy Boyd, Donnie Mires, Connie Woods, Bobby Swan, Larry Hammett, Tom Day, Bryan McKinley, Donny Ratcliff, Don Lormand, Robert Dunn, Violet Branch, Robert Roesler, Wayne Iles, Raymond Guilbeaux, Johnny Dugas, Paula Burton.
Martha Rogers, Robert Burris, Jerry Caillier, Carolyn Lemons, John Scofield, Carol Perry, Kenny Lalonde, Linn Cardner, Mike Catt, Pete Runnels, Russell Bottley, James Luna, Dick Powell, Billie Carter, David Teague, Carl Floyd, Skip Moore, Pete Sterling, Brian Murphy, Montie Moran, Doug Rogers, Rick Keszeg, Cary Bresie, Scott Garvie, Pat Key, Rodney Townsend, Jerry Howeth, Phillip Brown, Andrew Hayes, Linda Moore, Glen Oliver, Carol McGill, Bob Byerly, Jerry Hughes, Bart Williams, Loretta Edwards, Brooks Hill, Janet Lemoine, Benis Lee, Lynn Smith, Ebb Moore, Steve Pomeroy, Jerrod Bland, Barry Thibodeaux, Charles Broussard, Sharon Bearden, Bob Hoepner, Ferral Ashby, Joe Doucet, J.B. Arrington, Bill Ellison, Dana Cruse, Dennis Lee, Jerry Ann Trouard, Teresa Caraway.
Dennis Bishop, Gus Beuershausen, Leon Delome, Grant Gipson, Jeep Colburn, Jerry Nichols, Kevin Hebert, Brian Mingle, Loretta Hughes, Dwayne Mims, Oscar Smith, Joe Parkhurst, Pete Gresham, Charlie Miller, Chris Gunn, Ed Dyer, Bill Jackson, Bill Bromley, Ace Amodeo, Mike Bernard, Ken Wernig, Todd McLane, John Tate, Hal LaPray, Bob Campbell, Roderick Robertson, Buddy Hahn, Mark Foreman, Manuel Solis, Earl Parker, Neil Watts, John Martinez, Terry Childers, Joan Quartermont, Jeff Mathews, Tiffany Rochelle, Dempsie Jaynes, Kyle Walker, Randy Brown, Clay Dugas, Ellis Boyd, Glenn “Smoothie” Earle, Ron Cowling, Ruth Corder, Billy Bayliss, Andre Robertson, David Montagne, Earl Collier, Dewey Scott, Robert Tywater, Louise Savoy, Darrel Latiolais, John Cash Smith, Mary Beth Benoit, Jimmy Verrett, Angelique Catt, Russell Cronin, Al Granger, Kris Cherry, Richard Turkel, Rodney Townsend, Jr., Mark Williams.
David Dunn, Cecil Byers, Bo Brannick, Jimmy Owens,, Ollie Halten, Waymon Sibley, Rufus Flurry, Aaron Burke, Kris Olsen, Wayne Sparrow, David Hoelzer, James Bloodworth, Ron Roberts, Mike Hebert, Tim Hughes, Phillip Madar, Myrt Myers, Lou Garriga, Becky Grant, Vicki Landry, Gene Steele, Ken Reeves, Jimmy Ray Burris, Brenda Morgan, Robert Mortimer, Mark Meadows, Jody Gray, Ruby Collins, Chris Hyde, Clifford Bray, Darline Zavada, Todd Marburgh, Dawn Collins, Stacy Caillavet, John Broussard, Greg Choate, Dave Walsh, Williard Lanier, Calvin Collins, Greg Smith, Jerome Wilkerson, Joyce Prescott, Keith Hogan, David Piland, Lana Stogner, Kevin Philen, Vernon Davis, David Hollier, John Lister, Anthony Padilla, Erin Godina, Greg Turbeville, Gail Griffith, Danny Blacksher, Terry Myers, Nancy Finchum, Johnny Trahan, Curt Leger, George Nevarez, Patrick Toomey, Larry Fisher.
Gary Pollock, Sandy Walker, Anita Vidrine, Bud Martin, Natalie Simon, Jerry Meads, Gary Mainero, Steve Taylor, Richard Scott, Lisa Dies, Mark Netherly, Barbara Hayes, Derrick Jones, Dale Peddy, Todd Hoffpauir, Terry Steubing, Donna Evans, Teresa Schreck, David Davis, Shirley Walker, Larry Woods, Steve Champion, Rex Ansley, Connie Burnitt, Greg Willis, Pat Anglin, George Baker, Dan Mohon, Steve Issacs, Susan Nimmo, James Blair, Troy Burton, Homer Stockton, Nita Duffee, Vic Arceneaux, Rick Keszeg, Don Burgess, Tommy Carroll, Barbara Bergeron, Brenda Campbell, Paula Legate, Connie Lemaire, Debbie Perry, Scott Swearingen, Camilla Richard, Phyllis McCall, Brandon Prouse, Steve Griffith, Carolyn Schramm, Jessie West, C.A. Keasler, Betty Merchant, Ronnie Moody, John Young, Kay Morris, Jim Dwight, George Mortimer, Larry Willette, Leon King, Hughie Allen, Gail Griffith, John Rowland, Leon Evans, Preston Fuller, Karl Eason, Jim Mouton, Kerry Franks, Dean Granger, Peggy O’Leary, Bret Johns, J.D. Willis, B.J. Morgan, Wayne Iles.
Bob Campbell, Ralf Mims, Louis Manuel, Richard Roddy, Sandy Turner, Ralph Barrientos, Shea Simon, Chris Cartwright, Sam Lucia, Jack Jones, Shirley “Fuzz” Ware, Gary Ware, Warren Claybar, Charlie Greenwell, Gary Mulhollan, J.C. Sea, John Hardin, Gene Tannehill, Anne Foster, Matt Murphy, Mike Collins, Sam Hudson, Aubrey Welch, Virgie Thomas, Charlotte Guillory, Elray Henson, Marilyn Malvo, Chad Havens, Wendy Rost, Josh Smalley, Art Mason, Mike Reed, Ray Tilley, Keith Doucet, Chad Bryant, Victor Enard, Violet Branch, Roddy Richards, Hugh Granger, Toby Foreman, Gary Thibodeaux, Stephen Lee, David Winfrey.
Doug Posey, Rick Sand, Joe Raburn, Wallace Culps, Angie Simar, Bryant Calcote, Wayne Lowe, Connie Powell, Jack Horton, Tony Perry, Gene Dixson, Joy Haney, Bruce Savoy, Becky Rhoden, Dean Priddy, Randy Vayon, Heath Martin, Ed Freiberg, George Sepulvado, Johnny Dorman, Ronnie Puckett, Brenda Campbell, Lori Thompson, Madge Rogers, Travis Ashworth, Marty Monogue, Dave Young, Jeremy Green, Harry Sharpless, Ronnie Puckett, Bobbie Murphy, Jill Williams, Brandon Seaman, Jodie Pledger, Richard Terry, Marla Zoch, Quincy Procell, John Gradnigo, Judy Lowe, Richard Porter, Bart Williams, Joyce Drake, Jim Rawls, Bill Nicholas, Mark Berton, Ray “Mario” Dal Sasso, Jane Couvillion, Mickey Bergeron, Cheree Benoit, Jakie Stine, Pat Clark.
Jonathan Vandagriff, David Haney, Ron McPherson, Gene McCormick, Delle Bates, Gerald Beach, Ray Montagne, Wayne Outlaw, Carl Thibodeaux, Mike Bernard, Paul Mott, Kermit Richard, Ray Pousson, Charlie Blalack, Dick Alexander, Jeff Dalton, Craig Corder, Pancho McGill, Roland Wolfford, Dave Maddox, Robin Brooks, Katie Mulhollan, Shirley Almazan, Marlynne McNeese, Paul Vaughan, Vernon Myers, Billy Denham, Reggie Parker, Louis Willey, Clyde Davis, Bob Brown, Laurie Modisette, Bob Baptista, Jay Brown, David Williams, Russell Covington, Jerry Montgomery, Harold Gross, Glenda Bass, Russell Turkel, Larry Fisher, Steve Pesek, Charles Liggio, John Garrett, Brown Claybar, Larry Warner, Shelby May, Dickie Colburn, Joe Barrios, Virgis Benoit, Dwight Bickham, Miguel Castellanos, Howard Minor.
David Claybar, J.L. Vincent, Ross Smith, Dave Pederson, Peggy Vincent, Charlotte Montgomery, Sleepy Smith, Gwen Barton, Ron Sigler, Pat Brown, James Sanders, B.K. Ware, Leonard Brown, Billy Shults, Don Covington, Jeremy Hogg, Alicia Hebert, Reanna Morris, Ronnie Rost, Gay Richardson, Jim Turpin, Kelly Alford, Alan Whipkey, Jane Dunn, Ann Lieby, John Harrell, Max Staudt, Charlotte Tucker, Moe Litton, Glenn Hill, Maurice Mueschke, Martha Oliver, John Young, Tommy Ewing, Ernie Dyer, Carroll Holt, Shane Johns, Denise Himel, Pat Fountain, Sid Caillavet, Paul Patin, Lona Vasquez.
Dennis Duhon, Calvin Parker, Jimmy Sattler, Rodney Dove, Lawrence Hunt, Eddie Faulk, Cornel Thompson, Sam Kittrell, Dick Behnke, Huel Fontenot, Dora Lorimer, Ronnie Burton, Robert “Woody” Wood, Vicky Walters, Mike White, Frank Skeeler, David Payne, John Hersey, Dee Payne, Haazen Kenney, Bonnie Mingle, John Kimbrough, Wayne Peveto, Gene Alsandor, Bubba Lanning, Wayne Morris, Dale LeBlanc, Sammy Owens, Heath Mouton, Harold Fuqua, Roger Hall, Joe Peery, Bob Hood, James Rigler, Robert Sims, Joe Sanders, Bill Modisette, Mark Oldham, Mackey Clasby, Vernon Collier, Michael Arnaud, Jay Ayers, Jeanette Cleaver, Ray Burch, Gerhard Hommel, Walter Landisch.
Jimmy Sims, Joe Ware, Roy Dunn, Phyllis Ryan, Eric Hinton, Debbie Fusilier, Penny Leleux, Les Patin, Debbie Buckalew, Ricky Trahan, Melinda Gipson, Jet Toohey, James Stringer, Alan Sanders, John Cooper, Glenn Toohey, Sam Lucia, Lon Craft, Margaret Peeples, Mike Abbott, Charles Gant, Oliver Seastrunk, Earl Geis, Mike Leonard, Van Vandervoort, Jack Burney, Brandon Landry, Randy Crouch, Ray Rogers, Gary Stelly, Pat Johnson, Andy Allen, Keith Staudt, Louis McIntire, Brandon Fisher, Fred Zoch, Troy Burke, Bubba Brown, David Clary, Joey Campbell, Robert Query, Gary Thibodeaux, Tim Bonnin, Jay James, John Griffith, Randy Jarrell, Jimmy Jones, Joe Payne, Donald Moss, Betty Melton, Doug Nelms, Cecil Sylvester, Roy Knolley, Wade Smith, Shea Brown, Sam Ambers, John Raughton, Pat Leverne, James Scott, Ann Harner, Jenny Taylor, David Trahan, Donnie Shockley, Jr., John Crawford, Jim Gordon, Jim Colley, Dennis Doggett, Sue Rathburn, Keith Lyons, Wayne Franklin, Mandy Rogers, Terry Landry, Billie Rogers, Albert Gore, Betsy Phillips, Trent Cooper, Steve Toal, James Ray, Mike Hughes, Mark Magnuson, Ed Rasmussen, Gary Mulhollan, Miles Hall, Bobby Tanner, Jason Gipson, Jade Saucier, Georgia Corder, Ron Logan, Ken Manuel, Don Harmon, Sanford Lummus, Hunter Sheridan, Lewis Sims, Tommy Carroll, Van Wade.
And a VERY MERRY CHRISTMAS to my e-mail readers Dick and Gail Kazmar, Bobbie, Dick and Joe Wechter, Don and Linda Bivens, Karen and Brian Smith, Earl Thomas, Brock and Glenna Bult, R.C. Slocum, Paul Groncki, Jim Rodda, Joey Robins, Bobbie Earle, Wayne and Kaye Morris and for anyone I may have missed, especially you, my loyal readers who have been with Kaz’s Korner since its inception Sept. 12, 1966.